Elderly couple cuddling – they seem to be sad.

Couples in isolation

psychologial and physical well-being relationship

When couples cut themselves off from the world too much, this can lead to a toxic change in the relationship.

Over time, some couples increasingly close themselves off from the world, and excessive worry about their partners leads to compulsive controlling behaviour, that can even become an addiction. “This is often driven by the person who is worried. The worry that their partner may be found attractive by other people leads to pathological jealousy,” says Martin Krautschneider.

Unconsciously this could lead to them doing everything for this partner, everything is taken over for them and any external relations are avoided as far as possible. A mutual dependence is created and the system becomes rigid: “one person drives the other into an inner prison, which is very unhealthy. Any kind of healing is prevented by this entanglement.” You need to make sure that each person gets the chance to pursue their own interests. This means the couple can continue to develop independently of one another.

According to Krautschneider, another negative impact of the connection being too intense is that you lose all sense of excitement: “because the person feels trapped, their partner loses all sense of attractiveness and becomes self-evident. Only those who can and are allowed to develop stay exciting.”

It is the responsibility of each individual to maintain friendships despite being in a close relationship, to continue to meet up in groups and to remove themselves as soon as they feel the situation becoming restrictive. Don’t worry about emotionally intensive interactions – that’s the only way love can evolve! “Take a walk in the forest and be inspired by art and culture to get in touch with your feelings, and if your partner is being restrictive, tell them that you’re worried about becoming isolated,” recommends the expert.

If you want to talk to a professional about a restrictive relationship, you should contact one of the Austrian family counselling centres and make a free appointment.